Chickens in Florida

Yesterday was beautiful in so many ways. The breeze made the temperature perfect and Roman spent the morning at soccer camp. After a quick lunch, we dropped Lauren at Grandma and Grandpa's. The return to school is just over two weeks away and Roman was in need of new pants and shoes.

Boys just luuuuuuve to try on new clothes. At least he managed to pick some and enjoyed his ice cream reward. It was a treat for all of us and has put this Mama into a much better mood.

Meanwhile, over the last couple months, I've been researching and planning for our future flock of chickens. Being the [mildly?] obsessive person I am, there's a LOT of planning being done complete with plenty different breed photos and discussions of why one is better for us than the other. The current front runner is the Chantecler breed which is distinctly Canadian, handles the cold well, lays eggs all winter and, due to their physiology (the roosters have very small combs) are less subject to frostbite.

Partridge Chantecler Rooster

Somehow, over our taco dinner last night, the topic of Florida came up. Perhaps it was from a parental conversation about weather. Regardless, Roman asked if it was really cold in Florida. We clarified that while it does get cold, it doesn't snow like it does here.

"We should live there" Roman says.

Having Grandparent Snow Birds, I naturally replied, "You mean so we can be near Grandma and Grandpa when they're there?"

He agreed that that would be nice but then stated "So you can get chickens with the red thing on their head!"


Funny how he doesn't hear things like "put your toys in your room" or "stop being mean to your sister" but hears and remembers that the roosters I really love all have big combs. AND can put together that Florida = warm and warm = good for big combed roosters.

Maybe we should move to Florida though I`m not sure if Grandma and Grandpa`s park would support a whole flock...

Anxiety Part Deux

I thought it would go way - the sinking in the pit of my stomach, tight shoulder muscles and sense of impending doom. There's no reason for it to stay. Surely there are other people that Anxiety could be stalking instead of me.

Having my companion last week leading up to Lauren's sleep study was understandable. Now Anxiety has overstayed its welcome. It's like I've had a relative arrive from far away and they've decided they like my home enough to stay longer. The fridge is empty and the bathrooms are a mess and yet they stay.

Anxiety even stepped it up and is now hosting a party. The little turd invited Anticipation, Subconscious Worry, Obsession and the ever present but quiet Sadness to the party. Who knew they'd all be free the same week? I'm fairly certain Lack of Sleep started frosh week and tracked Anxiety down in the parking lot. Anxiety was waiting for someone else but once the word got out, well, you know how the story goes...pictures fall from the walls, tables get broken and the liquor cabinet is empty.

I'm sure they'll get bored eventually. I could always up the rent, disconnect the satellite feed, hide the car keys and buy only whole-grain-organic-no-fat-no-flavour-cardboard-meatless foods.

Or maybe down-grading the Internet connection to dial-up will be sufficient?

Girls Night Out (aka: Sleep Study)

After last week's exciting trip to Toronto for a sleep study consult, Lauren and I headed back yesterday for the actual testing. Knowing she wouldn't go to sleep on time if she napped in the car, we left home early in the day to spend time with our friends in North York. Their daughter also has Noonan Syndrome and we treasure their friendship. After a quick lunch, we headed downtown to the Eaton Centre. The promise of shopping for new dresses was enough to keep Lauren awake for the 20 minute ride.

Watching the fountain on the level below.

The Eaton Centre is definitely NOT geared towards clothing children. We perused the entire mall, found two of pretty much every store and finally found only one dress we liked at a store we have here.

Next was dinner at a restaurant - one of our kids favourite things to do. We picked Fran's on Shuter Street thinking they'd be able to accommodate Lauren's food sensitivities. They did but made it seem quite the inconvenience. For the price and lack of dietary effort, we opted not to go back for breakfast even though they were the only place open.

Mama and Lauren at dinner

With Lauren's early to bed schedule we arranged with the clinic to meet at 5pm. The intention was to give Lauren time to acclimatize before being plastered in "stickies". We were greeted by a very sweet undergrad and settled in to wait for the actual technician. She arrived just past 5:30 and was not so sweet. She was capable but not particularly endearing. I found out just how much I didn't know about what was required for the sleep study. I knew there would be wires and stickers but assumed - wrongly - that they would all be like the cardiologist uses where alligator clips attach to peel and stick sensors.

Turns out they're copper tipped leads that get a dollop of goo and are taped on. All week Lauren and I had prepped - that there would be stickies and they'd be all over her face and chest and legs "But not my hair!" Lauren would joke. "No honey. Not your hair" but Yes honey, they ARE in your hair. And the tech used a skewer to separate Lauren's hair, often scratching her scalp in the process. Each time Lauren cried I would say, "ow! That scratches doesn't it" which would calm Lauren but the tech would say, in her ESL Eastern European or North African accent, "No it doesn't. We don't hurt children here" (yeah. bullshit lady. try another one...)

By this time it's 6:30 and officially past Lauren's bed time. Techie is getting frustrated with Lauren's crying and I'm getting annoyed at how long the whole process is taking. If Techie hadn't dawdled getting all her gear we'd have been 10 minutes further along. If the lead doctor had fully explained to me how many leads and where they'd go, I could have better prepped Lauren. But I digress.

The final straw for Lauren was when Techie pulled out a hose with bits for her nose then tried to put it on her without warning and proceeded to follow it up with a butterfly like contraption.

Leads and tape. There's more tape than face here

When we put Lauren into bed, she was without the nose sensors. When Techie came in, she brought a smaller set and made sure to show us they were smaller. Yes. Like that's going to make a difference to a three year old. I appreciate the step at least as I think it did make a difference.

Techie opted to leave us at this point and let Lauren settle in to sleep. I had bribed Lauren with two stories if she settled. She was asleep before I finished the first - completely overwhelmed and exhausted. It was 6:45pm and 20 minutes past her normal bedtime after a long busy day.

The (almost) full picture. There are leads off two belts around her chest, two on each leg and
a heart rate monitor attached to her left big toe. Lauren`s entire left foot was encased in tape to keep the monitor in place.

I should have taken a count. By quick estimate, there are close to thirty wires and sensors all taped and glued to my little girl. What the hell was I thinking?

She woke the first hour and managed to remove the oxygen sensor which then had to be retaped to her face. You can only imagine how much tape Miss Techie used this time. I finally get her to settle again and the have to go ask Techie to turn the lights off. The lab manages the lights from the control room. When I asked her to turn them off it was like she'd never heard the request before. How dare my daughter not sleep with the lights on? Lauren fussed and fidgeted throughout the night but no more than most. We were co-sleeping for which I was grateful.

At 2:30 in the morning, I awake to find Techie coming in to adjust the belts around Lauren's chest. I can only guess that all Lauren's tossing and turning allowed them to slide down. Thankfully I was the only one she woke up. Then again, it took me over an hour to get back to sleep again.

There was a lot of praying going on on my part. I just wanted to get through the night, for Lauren to get through the night and for the test to have correct data - that Lauren wouldn't have some bizarre night where she didn't make the noises we always hear.

I was so thankful when she seemed to settle without too much assistance from me, that she made some of her usual strained noises but that she wasn't fully awake and screaming throughout the night. I was also VERY thankful she didn't need a potty break. Miss Techie wasn't the promptest help on the planet. Chances are Lauren would've had an accident before she'd have arrived to unattach us from the hard-lines.

This morning came and Lauren woke, her usual bright self at exactly 7am. I buzz Techie to come unplug us so Lauren can go to the bathroom and when she arrives, hands me a clipboard with sheets to complete and starts just ripping off leads and tape from Lauren's face. When Lauren howls, Techie is put out "oh. It doesn't hurt. You're okay" I comfort Lauren as best I can and try desperately to not shoot Techie the look of death.

Finally we get as much off as we can and leave a pile to soak off in the shower - another thing it would've been good to know - that the goo would need a shower to remove. I'd have packed a bigger towel. We managed but there was a lot of howling involved, not all of it Lauren's!

In the pile of paperwork was a page where Techie needed me to confirm our pediatrician's contact information. At the top of this page was a line for diagnosis. I'm not sure we were supposed to see it. I'm not certain it was a diagnosis or the list of things we were being tested for but it included "Insomnia, Sleep Apnea, RLS" and one more I've now forgotten in my quest to determine what RLS was (which I'm assuming is Restless Leg Syndrome").

We already have our follow up booked for September 7th and will have the full picture then. I also completed the client feedback form honestly - that we would have done better with more information and that our tech needed to remember our daughter was only 3 and to support her needs and her parent's words. I will reinforce this with the primary researcher when we have our followup. I don't want any other child to go through that again if I can have any influence.

The rest of today has been much better. We left downtown TO before 8 meaning even Starbucks wasn't open. Funny how small town Starbucks here is open at 5:30 AM but downtown TO can't manage til 8? Probably not wise to drive the 401 without coffee but I wasn't willing to wait around any longer. We arrived at our local Starbucks and settled in for "Breakfast in a restaurant Mama?" before meeting Roman and Papa at Sunday School. Even Starbucks was willing to make sure the food would work for Lauren's diet pulling out ingredient lists and finding juice. Might be overpriced but today it was worth it!

Lauren in her new dress (aka bribery) and banana loaf.

There's a whirlwind in my mind about what this could mean and was it worth it. Marginally. In the end, more information is better than less but at what cost?

You can thank me.

Anyone living in the general vicinity can thank me for the rain. Yep. Me. And you're welcome. Truly.

For months we've needed to make a trip to the dump. It gets put off for weeks at a time but finally, the bags of used kitty litter were getting a bit excessive. I know. Yuck. When we were camping, we missed garbage day. It's every other week and we have to pay by the bag. We can only load up 40lbs per bag and.. well, four weeks of kitty litter adds up.

So that, along with purging broken toys and construction waste from the [still absent] deck makes for a trailer load. Roman even helped dismantle a toy work bench that had been mangled by the spring wind storms. Despite his disappointment at parting with a toy (that he only wanted to play with because somehow children know when parents are purging) he was thrilled to take all the plastic bolts out. We discussed recycling and how the broken toy would do better being made into something new.

Last night I asked Hubby to bring the trailer up and we'd load it making today dump day. The forecast has been sunny, dry, humid and low rain percentages for weeks. Why should today be any different? The dump is only open three days each week and with the rest of the things we'd like to accomplish this and next week, today was the day.

We load up, tie down, tuck kids into bed, Hubby works in the studio for an hour or so, settle in for a bit of tv and... cue rain.

All night.

And so far, all morning.

So.. farmers? You're welcome. Kids wanting puddles and mud? You're welcome too. Gardeners? No problem. Happy to help.

Murphy? Thanks. I'll get you for this.

Sprinklers and sleeps studies

The heat just keeps coming but the kids have found their new favourite way to keep cool:

Love the wild abandon. Such joy from a simple thing.

Soaked through and thrilled.

No sprinklers today though. We left immediately after breakfast to make the trek to downtown Toronto (insert ominous music here). Even hitting "rush hour" it was an unusually quiet drive. In the words of Kevin, "Best drive ever." Of course "Best drive ever" meant we were REALLY early for our 11am appointment. We all went together because Kevin had a 10 o'clock session. We expected to drop him off then zip across town. Today? NO zipping required!

With so much time, I elected to park in my old familiar work neighbourhood and walk the 5 blocks to the sleep clinic. Someone was looking out for us as arriving early was helpful for once. There was plenty of paperwork to complete that hadn't arrived by mail. Thankfully the clinic has a playroom with toys and books to keep the kids entertained while I completed said paperwork. While it felt like a long wait overall, I'm pretty sure they really were on schedule.

As per usual, we met with an associate first.She asked the questions I expected about why we were there and what Lauren's sleep issues were and I did my best to describe the odd pinched strained breath sounds she makes along with her snorts and stirrings. I also explained how even a 13 hour sleep would still result in a 'train wreck of a day'.

I nearly jumped for joy when she was actually familiar with Noonan Syndrome and for once I didn't have to conduct an NS 101 class. We discussed how Lauren's particular case presents and how it impacts my hopes for the sleep study.

Next we saw the head of the lab who is a very sweet older gentleman - probably in his late 50s or so - who proceeded to tell me that the associate's assessment is that Lauren does indeed fit the criteria for sleep apnea and that, and I quote, "You were right and your ENT is out to lunch". The mention of our ENT surprised me. I replied, "He told you he doesn't think she has it?" to which I got a mumbled response but pretty much yep. I expect it's one of those paperwork codes "The parent has insisted on a referral for your services..." etc. Smart doc reads between the lines and poof! Mom is right, ENT is wrong.

That's twice my local doctors have told the specialists I've asked to see that I'm nuts. But that's another post.

In a nutshell, they feel her case is urgent and needs to be assessed as quickly as possible.Urgent is a strong word. Urgent turns out to actually BE urgent and gets things moving very fast.

We're going NEXT Saturday.

Now here is where we get to laugh at me a little bit. As the receptionist was telling me the available dates, I had flipped to September in the desktop calendar. Because seriously? who books something that soon in Ontario? I didn't even consciously think about it, just did it.

We both realized my error when I explained that perhaps the 10th would be better because it's a Saturday. Well, yes. In September, the 10th would be better but in August we might want to pick the 13th.

Yikes!

I don't know whether to be thrilled or devastated.

Thrilled because another piece of the puzzle might get solved.
Thrilled because yet again maternal instinct is vindicated.
Thrilled because it wasn't a wasted trip to Toronto...

or devastated because here we go opening yet another can of potentially nasty health care worms. I really don't want to add yet another issue to my daughter's long list of Noonan Syndrome related complications. I don't want to face the choice of surgery or not or CPAP or not.

But I do want her to sleep well and be strong.

We've already booked the follow up appointment. In just over one month we'll know the results.

In the meantime, we made the most of our afternoon and each picked what we wanted for lunch. Street vendor hotdog for Roman. Subway sandwich for Lauren, sushi for Mama and Papa. I was thrilled to find my favourite sushi place still in business and very busy. Indulgent but very fun for me and the kids.

While waiting for our order to be created, we waited in the park I spent most of my summer lunches in:

My joys, in Berczy Park