The brag page

Here we go... I have the best grade one boy EVER.

Today was the Terry Fox Run (walk) at school. Lauren and I volunteered to be a parent helper for the walk. The weather was promising and Lauren was willing to try being the sling rather than a wagon or stroller.

Here's the part where I talk about my kid being the best ever...

The teacher paired up the students to walk together for the duration. Roman was paired up with a nice red haired girl and he promptly took her hand while waiting to walk. He kept this hold on her for pretty much the entire walk.

While the rest of the boys (and some of the girls) were whining "Madame! so-and-so wants to be my partner" or "Madame...I don't have a partner! They went over to so-and-so" or dawdling behind or wandering over people's lawns or whatever they could get away with, Roman talked and laughed with his partner, kept holding hands and tried to keep her moving (she was a bit of a dawdler...). He also didn't get distracted by Lauren and I being there though he was happy to see us.

When the walk was done and the moms were to go home, he gave Lauren a snuggle and said, "see you when I get home off the bus!" and off he went with his class. Meanwhile I felt for the other parents whose kids were ... let's say, "less content"... with being left behind.

He's coming home happy, learning his dicté, practicing piano, eating food, not excessively melting down and actually doing okay playing with Lauren. Weekends are tough but it'll get there.

For now, I am a proud Mama. He's pretty amazing!

So far, no trips to the supply store... wonder how the neighbours would
feel about a runway in the back yard?

My Fairy Princess

I've never been much of a girly-girl. I love shoes but love to wear amazing shoes with blue jeans. Those who know me are questioning why I state the obvious.

Lauren gets some of this anti-lacey-frilly attitude from me, a lot of boyish behaviour from her brother but then balances this with a lot of pink and purple in her wardrobe (which she chooses for herself each day).

The newest addition to her wardrobe include fairy wings

and a knights helmet Roman designed. You need a helmet when riding your horse into fairy battles. Make way Frodo and Aragorn. Lauren the fairy princess has arrived!

No Sympathy Here...

I was going to add an AKA of "Mama the Hard-a$$" but didn't want all the filters to send this into the spam-iverse.

This morning I received "The Call". The "Your child just threw up all over the XX. Please come pick them up." call.

Which I did. He looked a little teary and pale but otherwise fine.

He's thrown up for no reason before and I fully expect he'll do it again however, to be sure and appease the school, we gather his things and head home. The whole time, I'm laying down the law as taught to me by my mother. (I know. What woman wants to admit she's like her mom? In this one, I'm very happy to claim her guidance!)

'If you're too sick to go to school, you're too sick to play. Go to bed."

And after some tylenol he did. When I went to check on him later, he said he was hungry. Sounds logical given he'd thrown up his breakfast. Down go two pieces of toast with honey.

Again Mama reiterates "if you're too sick for school, you need to go back to bed." He did. He was reading, playing under the covers etc.  I asked if he was ready to go back to school and received the reply that he just wanted some "Roman-only time" and that he was happy to spend time alone in his bed.

Lauren and I move on to lunch consisting of pepperoni and [non-dairy] cheese on [whole wheat] ritz crackers and are soon joined by Roman asking "How many more minutes until school is done?" and "When your reminder on your cell phone says it's time to pick me up at the bus, can I come out and play?" then "Oh! I'm hungry. I want some of what Lauren is having..."

Yeah. You're just fine. Half way through his snack sandwiches I announce, "when you're done, you're going back to school". No protests, no arguments just a happy smile.

When we arrive at the school, the kids are outside for second break. He very happily heads off to play, joyful at being back at school.

To be clear, I wasn't "played". After he threw up, Roman was fine until they asked if they needed to call his mom at which point he burst into tears. The teacher he was with at the time is not a mom. When I met up with his homeroom teacher, she completely understood why Roman was back and that sometimes he just throws up. It's quite possible she'd have handled it differently and Roman wouldn't have come home for an hour and a half.

It's all good. Roman now knows - and just might remember - that being home "sick" isn't much fun if you're not actually sick.

About Vitamins and Growing

Given our childrens' sometimes erratic eating habits, I opted for some chewable vitamins. I also opted to refer to them as after dinner candies.

Roman remembered them from a couple years ago so he was a pushover. Lauren on the other hand has not taken to them quite so easily. The first one was fine until she actually tasted it.

That was Tuesday.

Yesterday she dipped it in maple syrup left from her pancakes (yes. Pancakes for dinner. Try it. You may never have them for breaky again!).

Today took a lot more convincing and dipping it (lactose free) sour cream. The best part? Our final conversation on the matter:

Me: "Would I give you something that hurts your tummy?"
Lauren: "No."

Me: "Would I give you something to make you sick?"
Lauren (a bit skeptical): "Noo oo."

Me: "That's what these are for. To keep you from getting sick. They'll help you grow!"
Lauren, as she leaned back and gave me that "I'm older than you think Mama" look:

"I'll grow just fine with out them thank you."

Being an advocate can start younger than parenthood

My friend over at Life with Critters linked to a blog for parents with special needs children. Within that entry was this video:

May we all advocate as well for our kids and all the people who can't speak for themselves.

The Boss

In times of transition - aka turmoil - my kids revert to power plays. They try to be the boss in an attempt to control whatever tiny bit of their lives they can. Often this is in direct conflict to what I want, usually NEED, to have happen.

This morning it was getting to the bus.

School day routine has been the same for the past two years. Granted it wasn't every day but the process is consistent. Bathroom, socks, shoes, yell good-bye then out the door with whichever parent is taking you out. We try to alternate days so each parent gets a smidge of Roman time and so it's not "weird" to have the other parent there when necessary.

Today, each step came with stalling. Not sure there's anything that frustrates me more.

First it was running Lauren's sticker sheet to his room to hide in the closet. Next it was throw himself on the floor in the hallway just because. This was followed by crying and fussing because his nose hurts from his cold so he can't do anything - like putting on socks or shoes.  "It hurts so much I can't move." To which I replied, "your broken leg hurt a lot more than your nose and you still moved then. Get your shoes on." Not much sympathy coming from Mom at that moment. One stall and whine too many for sympathy to kick in.

Seriously. You'd think after 5+ years of me drilling into him how much I hate being late, how it's disrespectful and that I expect my kids to do whatever they can to be on time that he might remember.

It seems we've entered the age when he can recall the multi-syllable latin based names of a gazillion dinosaurs and what they eat but not that it makes Mama really pissed when you stall and dawdle getting out the door.

And it's not like we don't give ample warning or build lots of time into the departure routine. The more time there is, the more time it takes.

We'll see if it's improves tomorrow. Our conversation to the bus when something like this...

"You want to be the boss this morning." (note statement not question)
"Yeah."
"You know Mama's the boss right?"
"Yeah."
"You know it's rude to be late."
"Yeah"
"and you know it makes Mama mad when you dawdle just to be the boss"
"Yeah Mama."
... pause ...
"Hey Roman, if you get out the door faster in the morning you get more Mama-Roman time..."

"Oh... Yeah. Right."
"so you'll try harder to not stall and dawdle?"
Roman nods.

So we'll see. We won't get to enforce the Mama-Roman time idea tomorrow as Papa has a session and Lauren will have to go out with us but there's a whole year ahead of us...

Back to school - Part Two

Lauren started her second year of pre-school today. Last night she declared quite somberly "I don't want to go Mama. [pause] Well... just not ALL the time." Today though she was all set.

All set with snack bag, Ca and super cute crocs

The pre-school staff gave us the option to supply snacks only when the scheduled food wouldn't fit within Lauren's restrictions. This morning Lauren wanted me to pack her snack anyways and to do it every time.

I'm okay with that. As much as I would like her to be able to share what everyone else is having, packing something for her means I know exactly what she's having. Sometimes what is okay in one brand is not in another - like graham crackers for instance. Honey Maid - all good, even though they have honey. Honey is actually VERY far down the list. No Name brand however has glucose-fructose and it's the second or third ingredient.

Really I think she just likes having her princess lunch bag.

On a somewhat related front, if my daughter was a dinosaur, she'd be a T-Rex. Short little arms, big head and a carnivore through and through.

Yes. That's a hot dog. And yes. It's wrapped... in mortadella.

Sleep Study Results - sort of

Wednesday's Toronto trip was... informative but useless.

We arrived on time after a harrowing trip on the 401. Seemed everyone was in love with my back bumper - they kept wanting to get close enough to kiss it.  Thankfully I'm not that kind of girl.

Our appointment started a bit late but nothing unusual compared to many but it turns out there are sleep "emergencies". Must be. After receiving a phone call before our appointment started, the first thing the doctor said was "I'm going to read these results to you but quickly as I have to get to such in such which I'm sorry since you've come such a distance..." At least he apologized.

He read through the numbers: Lauren slept 11+ hours with 19 minutes of wakefulness making for a 93% sleep which he says is good. Her sleep patterns are normal - also good but it took longer than normal to get to deep/REM sleep. She had 9 episodes of neurologically based lapses in breathing and 10 obstructive episodes. She also woke up from deep sleep screaming and crying suggesting night terrors. On average, over the night, she stirred (or woke, I'm not sure) every 5 minutes. I'm sure there's more. I'm exhausted just thinking about it.

Next step is to see an ENT to have her adenoids assessed. When we saw our ENT a week or so ago he said her tonsils are fine and that adenoid size is generally similar to tonsil size. He didn't bother to lcheck them. When I relayed this response to our sleep doctor, he clarified that he's not an ENT and said, from what he's learned from other ENTs, sometimes one is fine and the other is huge and vice versa.

After learning ours didn't believe Lauren had anything (and only referred us because I insisted) and that his expectation is that there's nothing he can do without even checking, I'm now on the hunt for a new ENT. I've emailed our developmental pediatrician for help but am still waiting for aresponse. I'm hoping to find a pediatric ENT who's also familiar with Noonan Syndrome as I expect they're related and, if possible, someone with surgical privileges at Sick Kids since that's where we find the anesthesiologist I trust.

When we finally have Lauren's adenoid size assessed, we'll know if she needs surgery. If they're enlarged, out they come. After the surgery we return for a repeat sleep study to see if there's a decrease in the obstructive episodes. If they're NOT enlarged, we return to the sleep clinic for other treatment options. Either way, we're going back to Toronto in the coming months and not for fun and frolic.

Regardless of the above outcome, we also have to repeat the sleep study in two years to see how thing have changed.

My frustration with the trip was not so much the time (a lot of driving) and cost (of downtown parking maxed just in case but not used) but rather I didn't have the time to absorb the information and ask intelligent questions. For example, are the obstructive episodes clustered or evenly spaced? If she's stirring so often, how can she have normal sleep patterns? and, WHAT DOES THIS ALL MEAN???

Fine to have the numbers but with no interpretation or time to discuss them, they're just numbers. Even Lauren knows her numbers...

Where's the village when you really need it?

People talk about how it takes a village to raise a child. Perhaps. Perhaps not. Lifestyles have changed and villages have been taken over by babysitters, day care centers and after school programmes. Families are scattered across the province or even countries and friends with flexible schedules are hard to find.


Yesterday Lauren and I had an appointment downtown Toronto to get the results of her sleep study. When we booked the appointment, and even up until 8pm or so on Tuesday, Hubby would be working from home that day. It meant there would be someone available when Roman got off the bus from school. When Hubby finally got home from Toronto Tuesday night, he was scheduled to return to Toronto on Wednesday too.

Great. Two cars in Toronto and no one guaranteed to be home when the bus returned Roman at 4pm.

Lauren's appointment was scheduled for 10:30. Even if the doctor ran late and we didn't start until 11:30 and spoke for a full hour, our estimated departure would still be a reasonable 12:30ish pm. But this doesn't account for traffic, accidents (mine or someone else's) or who-knows-what-else-could-happen to then have a 5 1/2 year old boy, dropped off at home to find no one there.

Literally no one. Everyone we could think off was away - grandparents, aunt and uncle, even the neighbours happened to be away for three days. Friends were either working or had to be home to meet their own kids off the bus. Compounding the problem was having a new bus driver that let Roman off the bus on Monday without an adult to meet him. It's an issue because a) we have a by-law that requires a child to be met at the bus until they are 6 and b) there was no indication that anyone was home at all. The bus was completely out of sight by the time I got out the door to meet him. My little guy, because really, 5 1/2 is still LITTLE, could've come home to an empty locked house and no one to go to. Not even the neighbours. Let's not contemplate the therapy bills for that one.

(For the record, I'm not upset with the bus driver. Roman is in Grade One and most Grade One's are 6, plus he's very tall and seems older than he is. Since it was the very first time on the route, how could the driver know Roman was to be met? As well, Roman was the first off instead of last as he has been the last two years. I wasn't there waiting because I didn't expect him for another 20 minutes...)

But back to Tuesday night. Hubby and I went through the list - this person? nope. That person? Nope. Try so-and-so. Make the phone call - Nope they're out of town tomorrow and don't know when they'll be home. What about them? No answer there. Must be away.  I even scrolled through our telephone phone book to see who's listed in case I missed anyone. It's full of doctor's office numbers and family who are away or too far away.

Finally - thankfully -  I realize that I have one new friend who is amazing. Her daughter takes the bus but if she picked her up at school she could be here to meet Roman's bus. She was an angel. She didn't mock my obsessive behaviour. Didn't tease me about being so concerned about the what-if's that I'm calling people at 10 o'clock at night. Was perfectly willing to pick up her daughter, the daughter's friend they care for after school and come out of town. Best of all, she didn't think it odd that I wanted - needed - it to be a, "Be here unless I call you that I'm home" type arrangement.

My village might only have one other mom in it, but I'm really glad it's Gen.

Grade One starts today...

All summer I've been anticipating the return to school. While I do enjoy spending time with my kids, I also enjoy spending time AWAY from my kids. Roman too enjoys spending time away. I'm fairly certain we were all getting sick of each others' company.

Then it came to the night before. The kids were all tucked, the tv was off and we were headed to bed when it struck me. My little guy is off to school Every day. And it won't be done until he's all grown up. Yes we'll have summers and Christmas holidays etc but no more months on end of days together to play.

Waiting for the bus and having a laugh with Papa

It's good for him to be at school. I am not a home school type mom - I don't have the patience or the interest - but I miss him today.

Tomatoes as far as the eye can seeAKA: Enough tomatoes already!

The bushel is finally done. 38 pint jars done and 8 half pint jars of chili sauce are processing right now.

One dinner suggestion over this weekend was fresh pasta with heated oil, fresh tomatoes concasse and fresh herbs. Yeah. Not going to happen. To hubby, "while I love Klaus' fresh pasta-tomato recipe, I do not want to be anywhere near tomatoes OR boiling water for a very long time!"

Meanwhile, the garden is doing well enough. The few tomato plants we have are slowly ripening. Until they're actually harvested, I can't count on them for eating. We've been hit by late blight every season. Thankfully tomatilloes are resistant to pretty much everything. The tomatillo harvest has started and will carry on until the first heavy frost.

The onions are in and the potatoes. In both cases, one variety did very well (red onions and yukon golds) while the other were dismal (yellow onions and russets). The corn, for the second season, has not done well. It's very short, the cobs were very tiny and the tops of the cobs opened before the kernels actually ripened. Roman and I have decided we'll use that garden space for something else next year (more yukon golds perhaps) and buy our corn at the local market instead. Mosborough always has incredible corn!

As I was taking all our canning food waste to the compost, I dreamt ahead to next year when the chickens will be having an absolute feast - tomatoes, herbs, grass, corn cobs, watermelon... poultry heaven I expect!

The last few crazy days of summer

We've had a 70th birthday party, complete with a second adventure in fondant. Note to self: using fondant the same afternoon you make it totally rocks! and, don't pipe candy wafer shapes and expect them to hold up. They all crumbled to bits. Thankfully there was enough fondant left to colour and make this:

This was decorating attempt number 3. The bird was the only image
(in a different form) that made it to the final presentation.

We also had a trip to Oma and Opa's which included hikes to the neighbourhood play parks. Thankfully the neighbours had a wagon we could borrow. Lauren's generally good for the walk there and I have an extra 30 pounds for the walk back. I thought walking was supposed to help shed weight, not gain it!

Loving the view from up here.

Yesterday we went with a friend to St. Jacobs Farmers Market. Having learned from last year, I took our wagon. Lauren was soon displaced by peaches, peppers, more peppers, berries and a bushel of tomatoes. Note to self: Next time, HALF a bushel is sufficient. I'm up to 21 pint jars so far and only half way through. They're beautiful very ripe plum tomatoes though so  - oops. odd rattling noises... make that 20 jars as I pick out a broken jar - so I'll work my way through. I know we'll appreciate them later.

Roman towed the wagon for as long as he could. By the end
the contents weighed more than he and Lauren put together.

Today Roman and I met his Grade One teacher, saw an old friend and met the new principal. I was very happy with all three. The teacher is very sweet and seems to really enjoy her job. She gave Roman a tour of the room and asked him questions about his summer and his sister (who had tagged along of course...) With the principal, I introduced myself and mentioned that part of why I wanted to meet her is because Lauren will be registering for Kindergarten in February, that she has a genetic condition (I didn't mention Noonan Syndrome. No need to yet...) and that I'll of course need to do all the associated paperwork. I did clarify that the issues we'd be dealing with were primarily physical. I could see the principal's wheels turning and a bit of a change in her countenance. I'm hoping it's not an "oh no. Here comes that kind of mother...."

Tomorrow we have two families coming to visit. We're very happy to see them. Both have children Lauren's age, also with Noonan Syndrome. One family has an older boy Roman's age plus number 3 on the way and the other is expecting baby number 2. It's exciting and reassuring to watch their children and families grow and know that as Lauren gets older, she'll have friends she's known, basically her whole life, who are going through what she does and will.

I can't think of a better way to end the summer.